Sharpie Markers
by Chrysnurse
Summary: Duo Maxwell, Boredom, and Red Sharpie Markers. Sigh, perhaps they should give him more to do on missions so these things don't happen.


Disclaimer: Don't speak Japanese, very minimal artistic talent, nope, don't own it.

Call it a misalignment of the stars.

Call it a whim of the Gods.

Call it poor planning.

Whatever you call it…tremble inside at the fact that it has been allowed to occur.

Duo Maxwell….is bored.

Bored…Bored…BORED.

True, he is on a mission

but also true, he has finished _his_ part of said mission ahead of schedule.

enemy cameras…playing reruns

explosives…in enemy suits

and now…waiting for go time

Waiting for three more hours

with no laptop

no mp3

not even a manga

Sitting in a supply closet.

He had tried talking to his cohorts

"Hee-channn.."

*twitch* (yes, he can hear twitches, he is that good) "One word 02 and your stuffed penguin gets spaced"

"NOOO!!!! Not Sigmund!! I'll be good!" _should never have let him know about Sigmund!_

"Wuu-bearr…"

"02, 03 said he would help me dye your hair PINK if you traumatize me again, and that tone is not promising"

_SHIT!! Wu Wu I can handle, but clown boy is damn tricky_

"03, you wouldn't really, would you?"

"…"

_Right, better not risk it. And 04 is off doing that whole running a business empire thing, I swear the guy has more employees than small nations have citizens._

So, now what?

The braided bundle of energy busily proceeded to both explore and rearrange the supply closet.

_Ok, now that all the printer ink cartridges are in the wrong boxes, what next?_

Then he saw it…or rather...them.

markers.

Sharpie Markers.

RED Sharpie Markers.

synapses connected..

light bulbs lit..

choirs of angels whimpered..

And a slow and terrifying grin appeared on a young man's face, while his eyes positively glowed.

"YES!!! SCORE!!!"

……Approximately three hours later…..

"Are you certain everything is set 05?"

"Yes 01, it's done. Now where is 03 and that idiotic..

"HERE we are! Did ya miss me?"

05 turned to see 02 come bouncing happily up, 03 trailing somewhat behind.

_Humph, he looks like Tigger with a braid for a tail_

"03, why were you and 02 in the soldiers barracks?"

01 and 05 were concerned to notice that 03 actually looked disturbed; in a vague, emotionless kind of way.

"That boy is one sick puppy."

All three paused a moment, stunned at such an expression, both for the emotional content in one who is supposed to be without; and for the use of slang in someone normally so proper.

01 began to attempt to make some sense of the situation.

"Why were the two of you coming out of the barracks?"

"Because that is where 02 told me to meet up with him."

"Yup! Had to finish up, and he was running early."

"Finish up? No part of the mission occurred in the barracks." 05 broke in, not that he was actually worried that Duo would jepardize their safety by changing plans without telling anyone. At least not by changing them much...

"I _know _that Wu-bear, but I had free time, and that extra canister of sleeping gas, and...(big grin here)…SHARPIES!!!"

"Sharpies?"

"Yes Wu-Wu-Bell, Sharpies."

"Do not make me have to kill you now, I am tired and do not want to have to clean blood off of my blade. Now what about 'Sharpies'?"

01 pushed past them into the barracks, of course just to see if something had happened that might actually threaten the mission, not at all out of anything so un-soldierly as curiosity. Never that from this stoic, of course not.

05 followed close behind, to cover 01 of course, yeah…just keeping an eye on his back, not at all curious himself.

Upon entering the barracks there was only one point where your eye could possibly be drawn.

On the wall, where schedules and notices were usually posted, everything had been cleared. And in large, RED sharpie marker letters had been written the following notice:

**DON'T PANIC. This was a test, this was only a test of the efficiency of my assassination technique. If this were not a test, you would not be reading this, as you would be DEAD.**

**Thank you for participating.**

**Shinigami**

The name signed with a flourish.

As they looked out at the room of enemy troops 01 and 05 came to a realization.

There was, neatly drawn across the throat of every sleeping soldier, a red marker line.

Excuse me, a red Sharpie marker line.

No blankets disturbed, no pillows askew, no throat unmarked.

If a knife had been used, rather than a marker, it would have been a perfectly silent, efficient, massacre.

01 and 05 looked at each other, then over at 02 (03 had opted to stay outside, to guard the door you see, not because any of this was in the least disturbing to him, of course not). Both then turned silently and walked back out the door, a somewhat bemused 02 following behind.

"What? Don't you guys think ..

"02, that…was disturbing"

"But it'll be great when they wake up!"

"We are going to focus now on completing the mission"

"But…

"02, 03 is right, you truly are one sick puppy. But also true, this will cause a panic and be very demoralizing for the enemy, so good use of time."

"But I was….wait a sec, did you just say I did good?"

"Time to get back on track, the virus will be hitting the system soon"

"Dude, if I did good then I want…

"Yes 02, you will get cookies. Now, when the virus hits the system we need to be in position.

The rest of the mission went, of course, as usual. Things went boom. Enemies in mobile suits yelled "it's a Gundam". Asses were kicked. Etc. And the boys made it back relatively unscathed to the safe house.

Where Duo did indeed, get cookies.

And somehow, mysteriously, all red sharpie markers vanished.

Authoress's Note: Review are appreciated, they are the cyber version of cookies :)


End file.
